Donna Jean sat in the cool wet South Carolina sand right at the very edge of the Atlantic, sat back on her hands with her legs stretched out in front of her so that just the very tips of her toes caught the foamy trickle of waves that rolled up the beach. The ocean was black except for the white caps of the waves and the sky above the water was clear and there were stars in the sky. The wind had picked up and the humidity of the day was gone and it was cool on the beach and the water was cool on her toes. Behind where she sat on the beach with her family the sky was a wall of summer storm clouds that hung low to the earth, heavy with the collected humidity of the day.
“It’s gonna rain soon.” Her youngest son, Josh, said softly to no one in particular. He was sitting to her left, tearing a piece of seaweed into strips and tossing them into the water. Donna Jean felt the storm coming behind her but she didn’t look back. She kept looking out at the ocean and the stars and listening to the rhythmic breaking of the waves. A few yards off to her left her two grandkids were splashing around in the waves and throwing sand at one another and laughing, and she watched them playing and she laughed too.
“Yeah, I guess it’s good it’s supposed to rain all day tomorrow,” Jake, Donna’s eldest son, said, “I hate leavin’ the beach when the sun’s out.” He was standing at an angle off to the right of the rest of the group, smoking a cigarette and looking down the beach. There was a group of college kids down the beach who had a fire going in an oil drum, and the sound of beer bottles clanking and laughing and shouting could just be heard on the breeze above the breaking waves. Further off down at the pier, the arc lights illuminated the featureless forms of people fishing off the pier. They were only shadows at this distance, big shadows alongside small, father shadows and mother and son and daughter shadows. All shadows in the dark.
“Jacob, I wish to God that you would quit that.” Donna Jean said while she looked out at the ocean. “It’s going to kill you.”
Jake flicked the cherry off his cigarette and dropped it into the sand and sat down beside his mother.
“It all went so fast,” Jeremy, the middle son, said, “seems like we just got here yesterday.” He was sitting just behind his mother to her left, his arms wrapped around his wife, Bethany, who sat in front of him with her head resting against his shoulder.
“It really did.” Bethany said, “It’s so weird how time goes like that.”
“It’s because we all had so much fun.” Donna Jean said. She picked up a handful of wet sand and tossed it gently into the water.
“Yeah, we did.” Jeremy said. “It was hilarious when we got you up in that parasail, mom.”
Everyone chuckled. “We could hear you screamin’ all the way down in the boat.”
“Well heck yeah I was screamin’. Hanging fifty feet up in the air by a little rope.”
“You were hooked up to a parachute.” Josh said.
“So, a parachute’s not gonna save you when you drop in the ocean and get eaten by a shark.”
“Nana, who got eated by a shark?” Braden, her five year old grandson, asked from down the beach.
“No one, toots.” Donna Jean said. “Nana could have got eaten by a shark when she was parasailing.”
“If a shark was tryin’ to eat Nana I’d swim out dare and beat that shark up,” Brandon, the seven year old, said, throwing vicious punches at the air, “I’d say, ‘Hey dare, you mean shark, you leave Nana alone, den I’d punch him like dis and dis, then I’d stomp like dis.”
“Me too.” Braden said. “Nana, if a shark tried to eat you me and Beebee would beat him up.”
Donna Jean laughed. “I know you would, boys. You guys are Nana’s little protectors.”
The boys went back to playing in the waves and the sand.
“That was pretty darn funny, though,” Jake said, “you never would have done that before—”.
Everyone went quiet. Josh picked at another piece of seaweed and Jake fiddled with his hands and Jeremy and Beth sat looking out at the ocean. Donna Jean adjusted the padding in her bikini top, where her left breast had been. She pulled down on the bottom of her one-piece bathing suit, stretching it out. It was the smallest bathing suit she had worn since she was twenty, right before Jake was born. It was half the size of the one she had worn just the summer before. She closed her eyes and listened to the waves crashing and rolling up the shore.
“Yeah,” she said, “we can cross that off my bucket list.”
“Don’t say that,” Jake said, “it’s not funny.”
“What? It’s true.”
Josh threw the rest of the seaweed in his hands into the ocean and looked at the sand. “Mom, come on.”
“Yeah, seriously.” Jeremy said.
Everyone was quiet again.
Then Bethany started laughing. “Oh, man, BFF, that was the funniest thing ever when we were at the aquarium. When you turned around in the tunnel in the shark tank and that shark scared you.”
Everyone laughed.
“Dude,” Josh said, “that thing was hunting me. I just look back and BAM!” Josh held his hand six inches in front of his face, “And it was right here in my face with its mouth open.”
Everyone was laughing hard now.
“You took off running,” Beth said, “like it was gonna break through the glass and get you.”
“Dude, it would have if it could. It sucked.”
Donna Jean was on her back now, laughing until tears were in her eyes. A big wave broke on the beach and washed up around her. Her wig washed off her head.
Beth leapt up and ran it down before it rolled back with the wave into the ocean. She handed it to Donna Jean. Everyone was silent again. Jake turned away from the group and lit another cigarette.
“I hate this stupid thing.” Donna Jean said as she fixed the wig back on her head. “I can’t figure it out.”
“It was a great vacation, though.” Jeremy said. “Probly the best we ever had.” Everyone nodded.
“And there it is.” Jake said. The rain started to fall. It fell soft and cool and blew in the breeze like a gentle mist. Donna Jean closed her eyes and felt the cool rain on her back. No one got up. Even when the drizzle became a downpour and the college kids abandoned their fire and headed back to their condo, and the shadow people on the pier ran for shelter in the bait shop, no one moved. They sat through the distant rumbles of thunder. No one moved.
And then the lightning began.
“Well,” Donna Jean said, “looks like we gotta get in.”
They all sat for a minute longer. Then they slowly rose to their feet. “Come on, boys. Let’s get inside before we get lightninged.”
The boys ran up from the beach and walked alongside Donna Jean. She held out her hands and they each took one, and they walked slowly toward the condo.
“Did you babies have a good vacation?” She asked.
“I did, Nana.” Brandon said. “I had the best vacation ever.”
“Me too.” Braden said. “Hey Nana?”
“Yes, sug?”
“Can we come back here next year?”
Everyone stopped walking. They stood frozen in the rain and the thunder and lightning. Josh began to sob and then he began to cry, and the rain and the tears flooded down his cheeks and dripped from his jaw. Jeremy cried too, and Bethany, and Jake. They all cried and hid their tears from the children.
They all cried except Donna Jean.
She bent down slowly and picked Braden up in her arms and smiled. “Yes, honey, we can.” She said. Her lips were quivering and her nostrils flared and her eyes were red and glassy, but she did not cry. Her voice was strong. “We can come back next year, and the year after that, and the year after that. And every time you come here, even when you’re a big boy and you have babies and grandbabies of your own, Nana will be here with you. And we will laugh and play and have the best times, because Nana will always be here.” She put her hand over Braden’s heart. “How does that sound?”
“Good.” Braden said. He smiled and wrapped his arms around Nana’s neck and rested his head on her shoulder. “I love you, Nana.”
“I love you too, baby.”
Everyone walked the rest of the way in silent tears through the thunder and lightning and rain. Donna Jean let them walk on ahead, then she turned back to the beach. Over the water the sky was still clear, and there were stars in the sky. She took off the wig and felt the cool rain on her bare head. It was clean and fresh. Donna Jean let the tears roll with the rain down her face.
She turned and walked up the beach.
“It’s gonna rain soon.” Her youngest son, Josh, said softly to no one in particular. He was sitting to her left, tearing a piece of seaweed into strips and tossing them into the water. Donna Jean felt the storm coming behind her but she didn’t look back. She kept looking out at the ocean and the stars and listening to the rhythmic breaking of the waves. A few yards off to her left her two grandkids were splashing around in the waves and throwing sand at one another and laughing, and she watched them playing and she laughed too.
“Yeah, I guess it’s good it’s supposed to rain all day tomorrow,” Jake, Donna’s eldest son, said, “I hate leavin’ the beach when the sun’s out.” He was standing at an angle off to the right of the rest of the group, smoking a cigarette and looking down the beach. There was a group of college kids down the beach who had a fire going in an oil drum, and the sound of beer bottles clanking and laughing and shouting could just be heard on the breeze above the breaking waves. Further off down at the pier, the arc lights illuminated the featureless forms of people fishing off the pier. They were only shadows at this distance, big shadows alongside small, father shadows and mother and son and daughter shadows. All shadows in the dark.
“Jacob, I wish to God that you would quit that.” Donna Jean said while she looked out at the ocean. “It’s going to kill you.”
Jake flicked the cherry off his cigarette and dropped it into the sand and sat down beside his mother.
“It all went so fast,” Jeremy, the middle son, said, “seems like we just got here yesterday.” He was sitting just behind his mother to her left, his arms wrapped around his wife, Bethany, who sat in front of him with her head resting against his shoulder.
“It really did.” Bethany said, “It’s so weird how time goes like that.”
“It’s because we all had so much fun.” Donna Jean said. She picked up a handful of wet sand and tossed it gently into the water.
“Yeah, we did.” Jeremy said. “It was hilarious when we got you up in that parasail, mom.”
Everyone chuckled. “We could hear you screamin’ all the way down in the boat.”
“Well heck yeah I was screamin’. Hanging fifty feet up in the air by a little rope.”
“You were hooked up to a parachute.” Josh said.
“So, a parachute’s not gonna save you when you drop in the ocean and get eaten by a shark.”
“Nana, who got eated by a shark?” Braden, her five year old grandson, asked from down the beach.
“No one, toots.” Donna Jean said. “Nana could have got eaten by a shark when she was parasailing.”
“If a shark was tryin’ to eat Nana I’d swim out dare and beat that shark up,” Brandon, the seven year old, said, throwing vicious punches at the air, “I’d say, ‘Hey dare, you mean shark, you leave Nana alone, den I’d punch him like dis and dis, then I’d stomp like dis.”
“Me too.” Braden said. “Nana, if a shark tried to eat you me and Beebee would beat him up.”
Donna Jean laughed. “I know you would, boys. You guys are Nana’s little protectors.”
The boys went back to playing in the waves and the sand.
“That was pretty darn funny, though,” Jake said, “you never would have done that before—”.
Everyone went quiet. Josh picked at another piece of seaweed and Jake fiddled with his hands and Jeremy and Beth sat looking out at the ocean. Donna Jean adjusted the padding in her bikini top, where her left breast had been. She pulled down on the bottom of her one-piece bathing suit, stretching it out. It was the smallest bathing suit she had worn since she was twenty, right before Jake was born. It was half the size of the one she had worn just the summer before. She closed her eyes and listened to the waves crashing and rolling up the shore.
“Yeah,” she said, “we can cross that off my bucket list.”
“Don’t say that,” Jake said, “it’s not funny.”
“What? It’s true.”
Josh threw the rest of the seaweed in his hands into the ocean and looked at the sand. “Mom, come on.”
“Yeah, seriously.” Jeremy said.
Everyone was quiet again.
Then Bethany started laughing. “Oh, man, BFF, that was the funniest thing ever when we were at the aquarium. When you turned around in the tunnel in the shark tank and that shark scared you.”
Everyone laughed.
“Dude,” Josh said, “that thing was hunting me. I just look back and BAM!” Josh held his hand six inches in front of his face, “And it was right here in my face with its mouth open.”
Everyone was laughing hard now.
“You took off running,” Beth said, “like it was gonna break through the glass and get you.”
“Dude, it would have if it could. It sucked.”
Donna Jean was on her back now, laughing until tears were in her eyes. A big wave broke on the beach and washed up around her. Her wig washed off her head.
Beth leapt up and ran it down before it rolled back with the wave into the ocean. She handed it to Donna Jean. Everyone was silent again. Jake turned away from the group and lit another cigarette.
“I hate this stupid thing.” Donna Jean said as she fixed the wig back on her head. “I can’t figure it out.”
“It was a great vacation, though.” Jeremy said. “Probly the best we ever had.” Everyone nodded.
“And there it is.” Jake said. The rain started to fall. It fell soft and cool and blew in the breeze like a gentle mist. Donna Jean closed her eyes and felt the cool rain on her back. No one got up. Even when the drizzle became a downpour and the college kids abandoned their fire and headed back to their condo, and the shadow people on the pier ran for shelter in the bait shop, no one moved. They sat through the distant rumbles of thunder. No one moved.
And then the lightning began.
“Well,” Donna Jean said, “looks like we gotta get in.”
They all sat for a minute longer. Then they slowly rose to their feet. “Come on, boys. Let’s get inside before we get lightninged.”
The boys ran up from the beach and walked alongside Donna Jean. She held out her hands and they each took one, and they walked slowly toward the condo.
“Did you babies have a good vacation?” She asked.
“I did, Nana.” Brandon said. “I had the best vacation ever.”
“Me too.” Braden said. “Hey Nana?”
“Yes, sug?”
“Can we come back here next year?”
Everyone stopped walking. They stood frozen in the rain and the thunder and lightning. Josh began to sob and then he began to cry, and the rain and the tears flooded down his cheeks and dripped from his jaw. Jeremy cried too, and Bethany, and Jake. They all cried and hid their tears from the children.
They all cried except Donna Jean.
She bent down slowly and picked Braden up in her arms and smiled. “Yes, honey, we can.” She said. Her lips were quivering and her nostrils flared and her eyes were red and glassy, but she did not cry. Her voice was strong. “We can come back next year, and the year after that, and the year after that. And every time you come here, even when you’re a big boy and you have babies and grandbabies of your own, Nana will be here with you. And we will laugh and play and have the best times, because Nana will always be here.” She put her hand over Braden’s heart. “How does that sound?”
“Good.” Braden said. He smiled and wrapped his arms around Nana’s neck and rested his head on her shoulder. “I love you, Nana.”
“I love you too, baby.”
Everyone walked the rest of the way in silent tears through the thunder and lightning and rain. Donna Jean let them walk on ahead, then she turned back to the beach. Over the water the sky was still clear, and there were stars in the sky. She took off the wig and felt the cool rain on her bare head. It was clean and fresh. Donna Jean let the tears roll with the rain down her face.
She turned and walked up the beach.
